1769 quotes from The Office!
Season 4 Quotes
Season 3 Quotes
Season 2 Quotes
Season 1 Quotes
Office Quote Search
The Office Season 2 - Performance Review
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
21
votes
vote
| Jim Halpert: | Today is Thursday, and Dwight thinks it's Friday, and that's what I'll be working on this afternoon. |
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
12
votes
vote
| Jim Halpert: | Well, I'm not asking for a raise, I'm actually asking for a pay decrease. |
| Dwight Schrute: | Uh, that is so stupid. What if he gives it to you? |
| Jim Halpert: | Then I win. |
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
10
votes
vote
| Dwight Schrute: | I even come in on holidays. |
| Michael Scott: | You do? How do you get in? |
| Dwight Schrute: | I have a copy of your key. |
| Jan: | That is a serious offense. |
| Michael Scott: | That is a serious offense, very serious. As is toying with a man's heart. |
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
7
votes
vote
| Michael Scott: | Did you learn that on the streets? Oh, I'm sorry... |
| Stanley: | No it's okay, I did learn it on the streets, on the ghetto, in fact. |
| Michael Scott: | No kidding... |
| [later, to the camera] | |
| Stanley: | It's all about my bonus. |
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
7
votes
vote
| Michael Scott: | Pam, you're trustworthy. |
| Pam Beesly: | Thank you. |
| Michael Scott: | And a woman. |
| Pam Beesly: | Oh no. |
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
7
votes
vote
| Pam Beesly: | Did you watch The Apprentice last night? |
| Jim Halpert: | Yeah, I can't believe who they kicked out! |
| Dwight Schrute: | Damn it! I missed it! I was out drinking with my laser tag team, I can't believe I did that! I never go out on Thursday nights. [looks down shaking his head] |
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
6
votes
vote
| Jan: | Michael, it has nothing to with your looks, okay? It's your it's your personality. I mean you're obnoxious, and rude, and, and, and stupid. And you do have coffee breath, by the way. And, and, I don't agree about the B.O., but you are very, very inconsiderate. |
| Michael Scott: | So, my looks don't have anything to do with it? |
| Jan: | [sighs] Oh God. |
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
6
votes
vote
| [listening to rock music in stairwell] | |
| Dwight Schrute: | You are giving me this raise, I deserve this raise. Yes! Yes! Yes! AHH! The least you could do is keep my salary consistent with inflation, WAKAH! Yes! Why are you gonna give me this raise? Why? Because... I'm awesome! I am AWESOOOME! |
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
5
votes
vote
| Dwight Schrute: | 'Don't sleep with your boss.' Do you think this is about you boning Jan? |
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
5
votes
vote
| Michael Scott: | [about performance reviews] No, no, no. I finished all of that. I'm very fast. Well, I'm not too fast. Not like wham bam thank you ma'am. But, I do say 'thank you ma'am.' But, um... not like wham bam... not that there's anything wrong with wham bam... if it's consensual. We're talking about office... stuff. |
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
4
votes
vote
| Pam Beesly: | Well, last year my performance started with Michael asking me what my hopes and dreams were, and ended with him telling me he could bench press 190 pounds. So I'm not really sure what to expect. |
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
4
votes
vote
| Pam Beesley: | Do you think Michael and Jan actually,-- |
| Jim Halpert: | I don't really want to picture it. But thank you, Pam. |
| Pam Beesley: | How do you come back from that? |
| Jim Halpert: | Um, you don't. I don't think, come all the way back. You know, especially working together. |
| Pam Beesley: | No, I mean doing that with Michael. How do you come back from THAT? As a human being. |
| Jim Halpert: | Oh, yeah, no, I don't think you can. |
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
3
votes
vote
| Michael Scott: | I'm a little confused, because first it's all kissy kissy, then it's all like regret, 'cause oh I regret that. But wait I'm still going to call you... but but wait we're only going to talk about business... but wait I can fire you if I don''t like what you''re doing... but wait what were we talking about at the restaurant? Business. |
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
3
votes
vote
| Michael Scott: | If by 'me' you are inferring that I have B.O. then I would say, 'That is a poor choice of words.' |
| Creed: | He wasnt inferring, he was implying. You were inferring. |
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
3
votes
vote
| Michael Scott: | Angela, your turn. |
| Pam Beesly: | Michael, Jan's on the phone. |
| Michael Scott: | Oh! Angela, you were perfectly satisfactory this year. [slams the door in her face] |
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
2
votes
vote
| Dwight Schrute: | Lex Luther said it best when he said, 'Dad, you have no idea what I'm capable of.' |
| Michael Scott: | Is that from Superman? |
| Dwight Schrute: | Smallville. And that's why I should get a raise. |
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
2
votes
vote
| Angela: | I actually look forward to performance reviews. I did the youth beauty pageant circuit, and I enjoyed that quite a bit. I really enjoy being judged. I believe I hold up to even severe scrutiny. |
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
2
votes
vote
| Pam Beesly: | [about Jan's message to Michael] I have one idea of what it means. |
| Michael Scott: | Okay, yeah, what, what? |
| Pam Beesly: | Well, I don't think you're going to be very happy with this. |
| Michael Scott: | Oh, great. Alright, well, now I'm in a terrible mood. Let's do your performance review. |
| Pam Beesly: | [quickly] Because she's conflicted. She has to be professional but she's fighting feelings for you. |
| Michael Scott: | Why.. that's great news. That-- that-- Why would-- why would I not like that? |
| Pam Beesly: | Um, just cuz that you work together and it might be awkward. |
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
2
votes
vote
| Dwight Schrute: | Ah, you know what, I am just going to zone you out for the rest of today. Okay, I need to stay focused. And I don't have to see you tomorrow, or Sunday, please don't call me, and we'll see how things go no Monday. |
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
1
vote
vote
| Dwight Schrute: | [singing and dancing] You are getting this raise! I deserve this raise! Yes! Yeah! Why are you going to give me this raise? Why! BECAUSE I AM AWESOME! I AM AWESOME! |
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
1
vote
vote
| Pam Beesly: | Michael and Jan definitely made out-- |
| Jim Halpert: | Ohhhhhhhh. |
| Pam Beesly: | Maybe more... |
| Jim Halpert: | Ahhhhh. |
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
1
vote
vote
| Dwight Schrute: | I went out and got drunk with my laser tag team last night. Crap! I never go out on a thursday night, what was I thinking!? |
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
1
vote
vote
| Michael Scott: | [to Jan on speaker phone] To what do I owe the pleasure of this call? |
| Jan: | I'm returning your many phone calls. |
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
1
vote
vote
| Michael Scott: | I just want to know, from the horse's mouth, what is the dealio. Am I too short? |
| Jan: | You know, Michael-- Michael it has nothing to do with your looks, ok? It's your personality. I mean, you're obnoxious, and rude, and stupid, and you do have coffee breath, by the way. And-- and I don't agree about the B.O. but you are very, very inconsiderate. |
| Michael Scott: | Really? |
| Jan: | Really. You're-- you're a great guy okay and-- |
| Michael Scott: | I appreciate that, thank you. |
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community!
1
vote
vote
| Michael Scott: | Jan is not in a place where she feels she can have a relationship right now, and it doesn't matter how great a guy I am. And that is all I needed. I'm good. I can go home now. |
1
vote
AD
Have something to say about the Performance Review episode?
See what others are saying!
Join the discussion in the Conference Room!
The Office Quotes is a fan site dedicated to NBC's The Office.
It includes the best quotes from The Office, voted on by fans.
Please link back to TheOfficeQuotes.com when taking content from this site.
It includes the best quotes from The Office, voted on by fans.
Please link back to TheOfficeQuotes.com when taking content from this site.