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The Office Season 3 Quotes - Grief Counseling

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Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
23
votes
Dwight Schrute: When my mother was pregnant with me, they did an ultrasound and found she was having twins, and they did another ultrasound a few weeks later, they discovered that I had resorbed the other fetus. Do I regret this? No. I believe his tissues made me stronger. I now have the strength of a grown man and a little baby.
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
18
votes
Ryan: A few years ago, my family was on a safari in Africa and my cousin, Mufasa, was um, he was trampled to death by a pack of wildebeasts and um, we all took it really hard. All of us kind of in the audience, of what happened.
Michael Scott: Do you wanna talk about it anymore?
Ryan: Oh it would probably take an hour and half to tell that whole story.
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
13
votes
Dwight Schrute: When I die, I want to be frozen. And if they have to freeze me in pieces, so be it. I will wake up stronger than ever because I will have used that time to figure out exactly why I died, and what moves I could've used to defend myself better now that I know what hold he had me in.
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
12
votes
Michael Scott: He's finished work, he's on his way home, WHAM, his cappa is detated from his head!
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
12
votes
Michael Scott: I lost Ed Truck, and it feels like somebody took my heart and dropped it into a bucket of boiling tears. And at the same time, somebody else is hitting my soul in the crotch, with a frozen sledge hammer. And then a third guy walks in and starts punching me in the grief bone, and I'm crying , and nobody can hear me, because I'm terribly terribly, terribly alone.
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
10
votes
Andy: What're we doing? What's the game? I want in.
Jim Halpert: Oh there's no game, we're just trying to get these chips for Karen.
Andy: Did you check the vending machine?
Karen: Ohh the vending machine. How did we miss that?
Jim Halpert: I have no idea. We went right for the copier, and then we checked the fax machine.
Andy: Did you check, your butt?
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
10
votes
Michael Scott: There's such a thing as good grief. Just ask Charlie Brown.
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
9
votes
Creed: You know a human can go on several hours after being decapitated.
Dwight Schrute: You're thinking of a chicken.
Creed: What'd I say?
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
8
votes
Dwight Schrute: Michael get him away from your head! He is covered in germs and bacteria!
Michael Scott: You can't get diseases from a bird!
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
7
votes
Ryan: When I was five, my mom told me that the fish went to the hospital, in the toilet, and it never came back. So we had a funeral for it. And I remember thinking, 'I'm a little too old for this.' And I was five.
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
6
votes
Jan: So, I wanted to let you know that we lost Ed Truck.
Michael Scott: Okay... let me see if I have his cell.
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
6
votes
Michael Scott: So did you hear the news?
Pam Beesly: The news that you just announced?
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
6
votes
Jim Halpert: [on the phone] Hi, yeah, this is Mike from the West Side Market? Well we got a shipment of Herr's salt and vinegar chips and we ordered that about three weeks ago and have-- Yeah... You have them in the warehouse? Great. What is my store number? ... Six. Wait, no, I'll call you back- [quickly hangs up phone]
Karen: [laughing] 'Six?'
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
6
votes
Dwight Schrute: If my head ever comes off, I would like you to put it on ice.
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
5
votes
Michael Scott: I'm not exactly sure how to say this--
Dwight Schrute: Ed was decapitated.
Michael Scott: What are you doing?
Dwight Schrute: You said you didn't know how to--
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
5
votes
Jim Halpert: I called the manufacturer, who referred me to the distributor, who referred me to the vending machine company, who told me they sell them in the machines in the building nextdoor.
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
3
votes
Karen: Oh nothing. They're just out of Herr's chips. But don't worry about it. My snack food doesn't fall under the umbrella of your authority.
Jim Halpert: Mmmm, that's where you're wrong. I'm your project supervisor today, and I have just decided that we're not doing anything, until you get the chips you require. So I think we should go get some. Now, please.
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
3
votes
Michael Scott: He was driving, on the road, and he went under a truck. And that's when his h-head was, seperated, from, the rest of him. I will let you know more as soon as I find out.
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
3
votes
Karen: I'm calling a supermarket in Montreal.
Jim Halpert: Nice!
Karen: [on phone] Bonjour. Je cherche des chips de la marque Herr's. Non? Ah... aw, merci quand meme. Au revoir. [hangs up phone] Nope.
Jim Halpert: Sounded good.
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
2
votes
Michael Scott: I love the people here. And if there was one thing I di- I don't really care for, is that they can be, terribly, terribly ignorant about other cultures. And I don't want them embarassing me, in front of my girlfriend, Carol.
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
2
votes
[Michael stumbles upon Kelly crying]
Michael Scott: It's okay. It's okay. Shhhh, yes, I know. It's been a tough day, but it's good to let it show.
Kelly: I mean, how many times do I have to confirm plans with Ryan [disgusted Michael walks away] for him to know we have a date tonight?
Dinkin flicka. To vote, login or join the TheOfficeQuotes.com community
1
vote
Stanley: [to Michael] You have just spit on my face.
1
vote

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